Excel Has Pretty Colors

So I’ve been working on my budget this week.  I’ve been looking forward to the rest of the spring and summer and how the unemployment will work for me throughout the summer months.  The past couple of months have been pretty rough; brother needs a vacation!

I have been surviving very well recently, but I have been working over the past months.  So it always sort of worked out.  I was actually making more money and doing better than I had been when I had constant employment.

It was very strange, but a very empowering feeling.   I would collect my weekly stipend when I didn’t have gigs.  However, when I did have gigs I would suspend my stipend and go pull my day rate and walk away with a very nice paycheck. 

So I wanted to see how much extra I would have every month.  I had started putting some money in savings.  I am being cautious of all my 1099 work and the taxes I’m going to owe in next April.  I would be lying if I said it hasn’t been pretty tight over the past couple months, but I feel like I’m starting to get the hang of it.  

Honestly, the hardest part for me was keeping my head about me when I had a surplus of savings.  I always want to clear off my credit cards and spend a bunch of money on stuff, like jeans and sneakers. (the moms would never buy me that pair of Jordan’s)  However, being the learned man that I am, I knew that the rent and bills were always coming right around the corner.  So I did what every reasonable person would seemingly do and save some of the money I made for the next months bills. 

But I was sick of living like that and constantly saving a few hundred to hope that my bills would be covered the next month.  I have had some work, but one of the gigs I worked is already over for the year.  I have survived these first few months, but I know that I must be smarter about all this. 

So I added up all my rent and bills in a neat little spreadsheet.  I only did house and personal bills like phone and medical Insurance.  I left off food and credit cards on purpose because I knew that was going to fluctuate more than the rest of the bills.  This way, I can change how much I am going to save and pay off some of the extra bills that show up.  (This plan is foolproof, I can’t believe I ever complained about being unemployed!)

Then in the other column I put all my unemployment payments and added all them up.  Excel is a really neat program because I could both of these columns next to each other and that made it easy to then take the difference of the bills and the Unemployment benefits.   However, I’m pretty sure I’m doing something wrong.  The difference came up in red lettering and in the middle of a parentheses. I don’t know what happened because it didn’t do that when I added the other columns up...

I mean, I didn’t change the colors or use any parenthesis.  I didn’t want to make it too confusing, you know?   Obviously something is desperately wrong with the programming (it’s the new version, and we all know it takes “Icrosoftmay” at least 2 years to get it right)

So if someone could do me a solid and call up Microsoft and let them know about this programming error that would be awesome.  I tried it on google docs too and got the same problem, so I’m busy trying to get them to fix it on their end. 

It’s a rough life being a technological Samaritan for these big companies, but it’s obvious this recession is hitting everyone hard.  I know that my position I should be worrying about myself, but I can’t help but be heartbroken over all those beta testers that seem to have lost their jobs…  

On The Dole: SPECIAL REPORT!

This timing was just too perfect.

Due to the fact that I do not understand the comment section quite yet, I wanted to make sure that this was put front and center in this blog.Thank you to Helen for pointing this out, we now get double blog bonanza to start week 5. Awesome!

MSNBC.com via The Associated Press is reporting that due to a (oh, this is so perfect) "software glitch" (HA!) Microsoft paid out too much severance to some of it's laid off employees.

Microsoft is obviously making a strong play to raise their status in this year's Dole Awards. Unfortunately for them voting has closed or else they might have moved all the way up to 3. I do have a little bit of clout around here, so I wanted to give a specific Honorable Mention to this act of simple foolishness.

Is this seriously happening?

A software company lays off a few thousand people, and the software that calculates the severance overpays those that have been laid off.

It's all topped by the fact that they are asking these employees for the money back. They sent a letter to the employees that were overpaid asking for reimbursement by check or money order within 2 weeks.

...Check or money order.

As if being laid off isn't actually difficult enough right now, they are now saying your severance was too much and they want you to return it. That is such a kick in the nuts to all those people. I would make a decree that if you are provide a service, and the service screws something up, then you are the loser. You get no mulligan. That is your own fault.

I think coming after the layoffs is the best part. It looks to me like they laid off the wrong people, or they didn't lay them off soon enough.

I look forward to the end of the 2 week deadline. I want to see how many money orders they get.

Keep it classy Microsoft.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29353191/

The Dole Awards

It has been a crazy end of Aught Eight and a beginning of Aught Nine. There have been some somewhere north of 400k layoffs since November 1st according to Forbes.com. There aren’t any jobs out there to be had; NY State has upped the weeks of unemployment benefits from 20 to 33. People now have unemployment for over half a year. This is incredibly helpful because there are no jobs to be had right now, and frankly, I like living in my apartment, so thanks NY State Government! Any way you look at it, things are frightening out there for people who are trying to make it through the daily grind. It’s hard out there for every person, whether you’re on the dole or not. There are very few jobs that offer stability. Even jobs in entertainment that are usually “recession proof” are feeling the impact. The way people spend money is changing, we’ll find out if it’s only for the time being or if it will be for the long haul.

This can be a terribly stressful time as well as a brutally depressing.

The dole isn’t here to remind us about how much this all sucks. It’s here to show us that we aren’t all alone in this (or at least you aren’t alone, I sometimes still feel alone)

It being February, and I being the obvious expert in unemployment blogging, I have been swept up in the awards season and have chosen my top 5 favorite layoffs from the end of ’08 and ’09 and compiled the first ever “Dole Awards”

#5 – Microsoft
1/22/09
5000 jobs

This one is very close to my heart. The reason I was actually laid off was because the company I was working for a company that was doing a show for Microsoft, but as it was apparent that there were going to be layoffs, and the fact that spending any money while people are getting laid became unpopular, they cancelled the show my company was working on. With the cancellation of this show, my company could no longer keep up the salaries of everyone. So with the lack of money and work, I was laid off, might as well just call it 5,001…

So what brought this up to the top 5 was the fact that they are laying off 5,000 people. It’s so low because they aren’t doing in one fell swoop, but they are crushing 5,000 over the next year. This is the first mass layoff in Microsoft’s history.

I know 5,000 isn’t a lot, and this is a bit of a sentimental pick, but what really sold me on Microsoft was something I read while doing my research. I read that Microsoft, amidst all their layoffs and cuts, are actually hiring more people over this next year. Seriously, you lay off Five THOUSAND people, and you start hiring other people? Don’t think you could maybe holler at some of those pinks with a transfer form, or perhaps a “request for resume” from another department? So we now have a bunch of people who weren’t necessarily “bad” at their job, that are now out of that job, and people who may not have had a job previously, now have jobs. Everyone follow? This seems backwards to me. Don’t get me wrong, I totally agree with that second part, but the first part is kind of bugging me out. I’m just saying; people who have jobs aren’t leaving those jobs by choice. If they are; then they are not smart, and probably not fit for work anyway. I’m just bringing it up.

My resume can be found on Monster.com